Americans will be comforted to know that His Wisdom Joe Biden wants our dangerously toxic nuclear waste to be managed by a “non-binary drag queen” who admits a proclivity for “sex with animals.” When “it’s” not supervising the long term storage of highly radioactive effluent, Sam Brinton likes to give “lectures on ‘kink‘ activism, enjoys sexual ‘pup play‘ and worships ‘Daddy Fauci.’”
Nuclear DOE meltdown
The Department of Energy isn’t sure whether to stencil the name Sam Brinton or Sister Ray Dee O’Active on the office door but whatever it calls itself is about to take charge of nuclear waste disposal.
Putting Pete Buttigieg in charge of the supply chain was a bad idea but this really seems like a catastrophe in the making.
How can anyone trust a nuclear waste disposal regulator who hangs out in a group “called the Order of Perpetual Indulgence,” who “dress up as nuns to raise awareness of sexual intolerance and transphobia.”
Brinton and it’s husband live in Rockville, Maryland. The 34-year-old unit’s not even sure what species it is. It was thrilled to land the gig, though.
It will now get business cards reading “Deputy Assistant Secretary of Spent Fuel and Waste Disposition in the Office of Nuclear Energy for the Department of Energy.” Brinton was piddling on the floor when it got the news.
His Wisdom has yet to make it official but Brinton’s already rehearsing an acceptance speech, noting “they were the first ‘gender fluid’ person to accept a role in federal government leadership.”
Others think it’s abusive
Brinton gets offended when people say “wait, you have sex with animals?” Like it’s a bad thing. “They believe it’s abusive, that it’s taking advantage of someone who may not be acting up to a level of human responsibility.” It has “trouble when we transition from pup play to having sex.”
The nuclear energy official explains, “No, I can’t have you whimper like that when we’re having sex,” because “I don’t want to mix that world. It’s interesting, because he doesn’t have to come out of pup mode to have me f**k him.” In 2015, it joined the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence and tweeted, “I am the slutty one. And the nerdy one #sexynerd.”
Not only does it want a freak flag to fly over all our nuclear goo, you can rest assured it’s fully vaccinated.
“Brinton worships ‘Daddy Fauci’ and sang a song in praise of him at the DC sisters ‘Lavender Mass‘ in 2021. ‘I like to think of Daddy Fauci looking down on us and singing this type of a song to the young people in his life.’”
Brinton is convinced the Palace made the right call with the appointment. It will “be doing what I always dreamed of doing, leading the effort to solve the nation’s nuclear waste challenges.”
It promises to “do all I can to bring innovative thought into this government role.“