Breaking News: U.S. Airstrike ROASTS Terrorists

The U.S. military command in charge of the Somalia campaign sent in an airstrike, because a hellfire missile makes the perfect “stick” to roast a ranking terrorist on. United States forces put at least one member of Al Shabaab on ice, hopefully it was the senior leader they were targeting.

Airstrike targets Al Shabaab

According to a press statement released by U.S. Africa Command immediately following the incident on Tuesday, while working in coordination with the Federal Government of Somalia the U.S. ordered an airstrike which killed a member of the Al Shabaab terror group.

The airstrike was launched in the vicinity of Saakow, Somalia, “targeting a senior leader of Al Shabaab” which “resulted in at least one terrorist killed.” No additional civilian casualties were reported. When asked for clarification as to whether they got the intended target or not, AFRICOM replied, “He was a member of Al Shabaab — we are not able to release any additional information at this time.” They have to scrape some of what’s left into a baggie for DNA testing.

The Somalis were in on the airstrike too. “Working with our Somali partners, we continue to weaken and degrade the al-Shabaab network,” Marine Corps Maj. Gen. Bradford Gering relates. “Our efforts are increasing security and helping to disrupt al-Shabaab’s future plans and ambitions.”

The latest of several missions

Al Shabaab has ties to both Al Qaeda and ISIS, so U.S. forces have been focusing on making life miserable for them. Just last week, they greased “an Al Shabaab bomb-maker planting improvised explosive devices on a roadway.” Usually, they send in a reaper or two for an airstrike.

Back in July, the airstrike AFRICOM conducted in Timirshe was even more successful, keeping seven terrorists from making it home to sleep with their goat. Currently there are around 500 American troops stationed in Somalia “on a mission of training and advising local forces to fight al Shabaab and ISIS.” According to General Miguel Castellanos, “We continue to apply pressure on terrorist groups and assist our Somali partners in disrupting their operations.” Do unto others before they do unto you. “We continue our support to rid Somalia of the likes of ISIS and al Shabaab.”

As reported by the latest notice, AFRICOM and their regional partners “recognize that stability in Somalia will not be achieved through purely military means. It requires strong governance and providing economic programs and opportunity for the Somali people.” Meanwhile, we’ll continue to send in one airstrike after another.

  1. “to sleep with their goat”. Now that is not only doing a good job of terrorist liquidation, but also doing it with humor. Haha goat humpers.

  2. So when will they do the same here on our streets . Take the terrorists out once and for all . What’s the difference if we do or they destroy our citys ? One time would change their minds and send them running like the bitchs they are . Take out half the delusional democrats too , Their the ones behind all this BS . Kill 2 birds with one stone .

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