Is This Candidate On The Bus Or Under It?

Elizabeth “Pocahontas” Warren is so desperate for someone to campaign to that she boarded her press bus and bored the captive embedded reporters for half an hour.

On the bus or under it?

When Pocahontas rode her iron horse into Las Vegas Saturday, national reporters were nowhere to be seen. She didn’t take that as a good omen so she forced her way into the press bus and cornered the five embedded reporters obligated to follow her around to the bitter end. After tracking her footsteps through the Iowa cornfields then on into the wilds of New Hampshire, the reporters kept anxiously looking at their watches. They’ve heard her spiel many times before in the eight months they’ve been tagging along to cover her daily movements, and were anxious to get in a little time on the strip.

For most of the trip, she paid them little attention but the lower her poll numbers go, the more approachable she becomes. Now she’s hunting them down. Warren held her private press corp captive for a full thirty minutes assuring them that she’s in it for the long haul and the setbacks aren’t about to stop her.

Warren says she’s all set for Super Tuesday. Michael Bloomberg, she says, can take a running jump. Even before he decided to buy his way into the game, “Warren made clear she believes billionaires should be paying a wealth tax, which would help fund proposals such as universal child care and free tuition at public universities.”


Bloomberg billions buy a lot of ads

She made sure to tell everyone on the bus the story about how back in 2008, Bloomberg blamed the recession on loaning money for black and brown people to buy houses with. They called the discriminating process “redlining.” Bloomberg says it’s simple economics, you don’t loan money to people who can’t pay it back.

Warren also went into agonizing detail about how she’s shifting around her ad budget to compete with Bloomberg’s billions. She’s spending $750,000 on South Carolina. Dropped some on the table in Vegas and went fishing for voters in Maine. She’s especially concentrating on the African Americans to pick up what she can get from Joe Biden’s followers.

The smell of defeat is in the wind for Warren. In her fundraising emails, they started adding deadlines, demanding contributors send the money now! The CNN reporter noted how much that sounded like it’s a sign she’s struggling. “No!” She insists. “They’re just figuring out where they want to spend their money to reach people in the most effective ways. In fact I think they’re increasing overall ad buy.” The folks on the bus glanced at their wrists.

It all comes down to cash

She knows that the whole race is about to boil down to cash. “We’ve got two billionaires in this race.” Then she started to ramble. “And, uh, what is it, three more people on the debate stage who immediately after New Hampshire headed off to suck up some more money from millionaires and billionaires. Wall Street money is pouring into the Democratic primary. So yeah, I tell my supporters we’re doing this grassroots and we need everybody to see what we are up against.”

In case you might think she sounds a touch ungrateful, “it’s not that people haven’t been helpful, they’ve been enormously helpful. We raised $6 million after Iowa. We asked people to set a $7 million goal going forward before Nevada, raised a million dollars on the first day. And I’m very, very grateful for that.”

Warren also confirmed that she would definitely put a hold on deportations as soon as she gets elected, at least for the first 100 days. “I’m committed to in the first 100 days, stop all deportations until we get a chance to review them again.” She wants to make sure “we don’t scoop up family members, people who place no threat and put them on a bus. People who are part of our communities, then they’re not deported, they won’t be deported. I want to put a complete halt until we can get that done.”

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